+memories+of+bossie+

it has been more than a year!

2009-10-03T12:23:00.003+08:00

It has been more than 1.5 years since I have last blogged.
Time really flies and I have become a working adult for almost 2 years now.
I read my previous posts and laughed.
i missed those schooling days where we had petty politics in school. :)
Life was much more innocent and fun-filled.

2 years on and I still place him in a corner of my heart.
It is truly amazing how events unfolded and we still end up meeting again. Despite all the efforts put in to forget him and move on.
However, I am glad cos god gave me a chance to face up to him and this time truly move on.

2008-02-16T09:44:00.003+08:00

Happy Chinese New Year to all out there!
It is the tenth day of the new year alr.
Somehow i feel that ive enjoyed this new year more than the rest maybe because Jamie came back and i totally enjoyed my time with her.
I guess the fact that we will no longer be able to spend times like those in the past has finally sank in and i move on with my life as well.
Dad touched on that qns and i guess she's gna stay there for good.
Think Koji will nv wanna come here.
I was disappointed with the manner Jamie answered that qns.
I can feel that her priority in life is no longer us.
I can feel the disppointment in my Dad's eyes. He dotes on her the most.
And now he has indeed lost her daughter.
That was his fear when she left for Japan 5 years ago but at that time she claimed that she will ultimately be coming back here, now it's apparent that she's gg to break that promise.
But what can parents say?
They just hide their disappointment and unhappiness inside and wish that Koji will treat her well forever.
somehow, i feel that she is being so selfish.
He is being so selfish as well.
I am so sure that our family will not be the same anymore.
More so if they get married.
K and the "big one" will nv get along.
The "big one" will complain and whine in a way that she has been doing everyday.
Somehow, the "sisters-ship" will nv be the same anymore.
Right now already it does not feel right.
At times, i feel rli emotional over this.
We used to be so close,
but now singapore is like her holiday destination.
It comes to a stage whereby I just let thgs be and let nature tks its course and if it turns ugly then so be it.
I have had enough being the "bridge" for everyone.
I am the youngest so my opinion and comments alws mean nthg.
Nobody will listen to the youngest even when the youngest is right.
They just shut off when the youngest starts talking.
So I will just keep quiet.
Everything i do is stupid and alright as u said i am the most stupid person on earth, yes i am indeed or else why would i let u criticise me as tho i am not ur sister and merely a stranger on the road, in front of all our relatives and friends and not even retaliate?
I think u shd at least show me the basic respect i think i deserve??
Seriously, how cld ive tolerated for all these years? I don't know.
Every night i pray that u can change, just a little, we will be contented.
How to carry on living with u? I don't know.
I guess that's why J doesnt wanna come back.
NOBODY with the correct mindset will wanna give up a carefree life for a life like a mute prisoner whenever at home..

I rli wonder why do i bother to do so much when nobody appreciates?
Did god create me to be a giver ALL my life???

I am freaking tired...

What happened to Wenny brought bad those memories.
Why izzit that we all love JERKS more than those who appreciates us more?
Why izzit so hard to let those freaking B*stards get outta our minds and hearts?
It is like the more they hurt us, the more we love them!
It makes me feel like i am a whore!

Everyday at work i see THE name, i pick up his phonecalls, how to move on?? How to forget?

I agreed with Sherry and Lyns that school days were so heavenly.
We don't have to worry abt money issues, politics at work, future.
As a student uve got to worry only abt exams.
Today, exams seem to be such a minor and insignificant issue to us.
I feel that ive aged 5 yrs after working.
I am so tired aft work everyday and i dnt feel young anymore.
This is it, time to rli grow up.
And it is getting tougher to be happy and laugh out loud nowadays....i envy my juniors and those of my friends who are still studyg.
I should be contented.
I mean I have a job, stable income, family, friends, evthg i shd have i have them.
But why I am still not satisfied?
It's like somehow i still feel empty and lost.
Something is not right but I dntknow how to explain this feeling.

Urghhh tell me what to do??

To my dearest Bunny- I am really happy to see you leading a blissful life as u enter a new phase in ur life w Gan. Rmb to look forward with hopes and enthusiasm. Evthg's gna be fine, u guys will work it out perfectly. Thanks for my DIOR ( it is like FINALLY!!! haha!) Looking forward to our nxt date. Love you!

2008-01-26T11:27:00.000+08:00

I am contented with my life right now.
I mean evthg is gg well and im enjoyg myself at work with my colleagues and the job scope.
Though i am still learning the ropes but i guess im gettting the hang of it.
I told bunny dear b4 i started work that i wld not be those no social life wkg adults.
I will lead a exciting one like how i used to lead my school days as a student.
OH MAN!! it is rli TOUGH i tell ya!
I am alws so drained after work and i think ive aged by 5years since ive started work!!
The thg is ive started for less than a mth!
I seriously lack sleep and lack LIFE!!!!
I want to watch 27 dresses but where got time???
Weekends alws seem to FLY by and before i know it, monday is here and im back at my desk.
I know i shdnt complain cos ive a job which im enjoyg and great colleagues but i am tired! :(

Work has been good so far and my seniors are happy with my performances so far.
I love meeting and talking to ppl everday!
I tell you, since ive started working here, the time i spend everyday on talking is the total amt of time i talk in A MONTH b4 i started work!
SERIOUS!!!
The amt of phonecalls are amazing.haha.
and now my friends comment that i cant stop talking when im with them. :)
it aint a bad thing i hope.
Anyway, in this line, u'd meet all kinda ppl.
Nice and nasty ones.
But mentally unsound and emotionally unstable ones are the toughest to handle.
Thanks bestie Sharon for introducing one to me.
He is perstering me! urghhhhhhh

CNY is coming!!!!
wooooohoooooooohooooooooo!!!!
I love CNY!!!
It is the only time whereby i can see all my relatives and catch up!
the most impt thg is that it gives me the excuse to buy SHOES!!!!!!! :)
i packed my shoes under my bed over the weekend and found that i have 16 pairs of news shoes!!!
did not dare to tell mommy!
i just cannot resist shoes!!!
they are my best friends!
and Yings had to brg me to this shop at MS and i saw a pair of rli nice blue heels that are so comfy BUT it costs $68!!!
i am still wondering if i shd get it.
reward myself on my pay day. haha!
but i also wanna get a braun buffel pouch which costs $115 aft discount.
HOW HOW HOW!!!!! :(

It has been a quiet day in office today.
I am tired of lookg thru profiles aft profiles that ive decided to tk a break and update my ancient blog. :)
another 45 mins and thats it for the day!
gg shopg!!! :)

Did they say LA galaxy is organising an asia tour????
oh man!!! BECKHAM!!!

Fate is really a mysterious and frustrating thg.
It doesnt stop playing tricks on you.
When I am finally gettg over him,
he has to appear again.
There are sooooooooo MANY companies out there!

2007-12-04T02:37:00.000+08:00

That EUGENIA ONG PEI LING totally "annoyed" me last night again.
I hate to admit it but I missed those whinings alot. :)
She asked me the SAME QUESTION like ten over times when my answer WAS ALWAYS THE SAME!!!
Sometimes I wonder why do i even bother answering over and over agn.
Then she will worry about the same thg for so long and keeps asking me and the shopkeeper the same qns over and over agn.
It just doesnt get stored into her brains!
She needs a million times of reassurance before she'd be finally convinced.
I really wonder how David can stand her and tolerate such negative "persistence"! :)
But i must say that she's rather sweet towards him.
The same CANNOT be said to the way she treats old time frens like ME.
WHERE IS MY VDAY FRAME??????!!!!! :(
Oh man she has been in my life since I was 6!!!!
I remembered disliking her during PYP days cos she was always eating so slowly that we cldnt win the group of the day. haha those were the days.
All complaints aside, my life will definitely not be the same without her in it.
So as much as I hate to say this, Thanks dearie for being sucha big part in my life all these 16 years! :)
Loveyou.
Enjoy ur Vietnam trip and hope that the present will turn out fine.
If not u'll blame me again!!!! :(

Went Paragon SoupSpoon for dinner and i simply adore their Velvety Mushroom Stroganoff.
I am a sucker for mushrooms.
Their Caesar Salad's nice as well.
Was not able to meet up w Jas or Amanda after that so decided to head for home.

Didnt expect to see my bimbos at my void deck!
It was sucha wonderful surprise. :)
Arent they sweet?
Thanks babes for dropping by.
Seriously, Weiling needs some sleep!!! :)
Loves to all.

Japan trip is confirmed.
13th Dec-24th Dec. :)
I cannot WAIT!
I love winter!!!
And i cant wait for our clique's party too!!!! :)
I love my girlies!!MUACKS****

I bought a skirt online just now.
haha laughed at me all u want but this my first online shopping exp.
more to come i foresee. :)

Read Miss Bunny's blog and im truly happy for her.
I am happy that she has finally found THE ONE and who loves her unconditionally and faithfully.
Dear, uve found ur happiness so grab it tightly and treasure it.
Stay blissful and i love u.
Please take care of my Miss Torto and Mr Evol k? :)

2007-12-02T19:27:00.000+08:00

Loves.

2007-12-02T19:24:00.000+08:00

She's mine! :)

2007-12-02T19:23:00.000+08:00

i love you to bits bestie!

2007-12-02T19:03:00.000+08:00

i like this picture alot! :)

2007-12-02T17:54:00.000+08:00

It has been eons since my last post.
I am rli lazy to blog and seriously there's nthg much to blog about.
Basically my life now evolves ard job searching, interviews, meet ups with friends, spending time w my family and facebooking.
Uh huh, its basically BORING!!

Anyway, regarding my job status--ppl stop asking me!
I am tired repeating my sob stories over and over agn.
Let me sum it up..to date, i am STILL NOT WORKING.
Its not that I have no offers but those offers were not wat i wanted and not ideal.
I have rejected three so far.
One, Management Trainee.
Two, Credit Controlling Officer at foreign bank.
Three, Events Executive at Lilliputt.
Though I was really keen on the Events Exec position, my family didnt approve or liked me to accept it. I was not too keen on the salary package as well.

So life goes on and I am still looking for the ideal job.
I am extremely keen on HR position and seriously, I totally REGRET not tkg HRM in SIM.
Sighh but rather on dwell on the have-nots, i'll continue to search for a HR position.
To date, I have concrete plans to pursue a post grad study in HRM after I've started to work.
Job search have not been tt smooth sailing at all.
At times it can be so disheartening and frustrating.
The feeling of losing out to someone else is jst so hard to swallow.
Plus the fact that that person is ur friend.
Its a double blow!
But ive learnt how to let go and move forward as a stronger person.
Indeed, I have to thk my ever-so-loving family for not rushing and pressurizing me to accept any job offers that came my way.
They kept saying there's no hurry to get a job, and that i must find one that ive passion in.
However, as much as i appreciate the support and comforting words, i cant help but feel inferior and worthless at times.
Its like almost everybody else is working already while im still bumming ard.
The feeling of inferiority keeps creeping in and makes me feel damn demoralized.
However, i have promised to try even harder and not give up.

On a happier note, if nthg goes wrg, i'll be away to Japan frm 13th-24th dec.
Jamie has moved to a bigger hse w Koji and we are gg for her house warming! :)
but we have not booked tickets yet which costs abt $1.5k per pax.
I only spent $800 when i went over in June! now its almost double to get there!

Christmas is ard the corner and another year is flying by.
This year seems to pass even faster than ever.
I wish I was still 16. haa!
Have plenty of plans for this year and i cant wait! :)
its a festive season filled with love and presents!

Dinner with my girlies last nite (minus Wenny).
I am so glad the camaraderie is still as strong though the last time we all met up was qte some time ago.
I simply love the simplicity of our friendships.
We all seem to understand each other so well.
At least they all understand me DAMN WELL lah! :)
Pity Wenny cldnt be dere due to her exam tdy.
Hey wennydear! im sure u can pass ur papers today! NO WORRIES SMARTIE! :)
I CAN'T WAIT FOR 25TH TO COME!
I am sure it will be FUN!!!! :)
I love you my girlies!!!! *hugs*

Damn! I am seriously BROKE!
I was just whining to my girlies and Jas that ive spent more than 700 BUCKS since weds!!!!
I have conquered 10 tops, 1 dress, 2 belts, 1 bottom, 1 pair of boots and make up.
I can declare BANKRUPT very very soon.
Shopping kills and esp if its shopping alone.
urghhhhhhhhh!!
Nick (not Jas's bf) has been reprimanding me non-stop last nite for spendg so much money within three days.
I feel so guilty lah after his "scoldings"!
WJ and him were bloody irritating! haahaa!
How i missed those two bros of mine.
Thanks for the ride to ECP and back WJ!
But i hope i dnt have to take ur car anymore if not i rli must buy insurance alr lah!
Ur seriously a road HAZARD man!
BE CAREFUL u hear! :)
Loves.

All of a sudden I am missing my Twinnie, Weirdo and Dumpling.
My SIM clique.
They are the typical girlie type of girls and they mk me laugh merely by listening to their girl talk! :)
I miss school!!!!!!!

**This is for my bunny dear**
Darling i know ur still hurting even though the incident happened qte awhile ago.
But as i said, they are safe now in god's hands.
What u can do is to move on with them in ur hearts and im sure they will be happy enuf up there.
They will watch over you and bless u so all the more u must live well and be happy again.
At least ur paths have crossed and u guys shared priceless moments together before.
I am sure they wld rather u to keep them forever in ur heart than still grieving n mourning for their departure.
So live well and be strong for them, ur loved ones who are still ard and most imptly for urself.
They will be up there watching over u and smiling on ur wedding day as we celebrate altogether.
I love you dear.

2007-10-17T17:23:00.000+08:00

Blame it on my shoes and the rainy day!

2007-10-17T17:22:00.001+08:00

2007-10-17T17:17:00.000+08:00

26 years on and still gg strong.

2007-10-10T18:25:00.000+08:00

Mommy came home just now feeling rli upset.
Never seen her like that ever before.
She's a happy-go-lucky mommy to me.
Alws happy and willing to reach out to others, giving them a hand.
I was getting ready to meet up with Hannie then Daddy came in to broke the news.
I was totally flabbergasted.
They were friends for over 35 years.
It made me realise how fragile can human relationships be.
At times when it comes to Money, nthg else matters.
Even 35 years of friendship.

It pains me to see Mommy like that.
I didnt know waht to say but just simply being by her side.

I had to cancel on Hannie yet again cos I feel that I have the responsibility as a daughter to be by her side during such times.

I know how she feels to be betrayed and cheated by closed ones.
Fully understand.
The pain is indescribable that u feel numbness all over.
They alws claim that time will help to ease the pain but sometimes nthg will.
Even years later, u'll still feel sore.

Hope that being by her side and showing her support will give her much needed comfort.

Meeting up with Andrea tmr for job searching matters.
And after that I have a second round interview at Gimmill for the position of HR Exec.
There will be opportunities to travel and thats why I wish I can be offered the job.
However, salary issues are never mentioned during the first rnd and transportation will be a prob cos its rather secluded.
We will see how it goes.

Actually I was offered a job as Mgt trainee at Strategic Partners last week.
Its a 13-26 mths program, after which, if nthg goes wrg, I will lead my own team of Financial Consultants.
In the process, I will go thru training with 4 depts, each for 3-6mths.
Namely,
Sales & Marketing, Projects, Training and Managerial.
I declined the offer cos Im not interested in the finance sector tho i know thats where all the big money lies.
I alws tell myself that my first job must be sthg i rli like and have passion in.
A job which will make me wanna climb outta bed to go work.
Preferrably, a job that gives me an opportunity to travel.
Thats why I rli hope that tmr and salary issues will go smoothly and Gimmill will offer me the job.
Anw, many have asked me why I went to apply for the Mgt Trainee position when I know that I wont wna a job in a financial services co.
Well, here's how the story goes.
Actually, I applied for the position of Events Co-ordinator on JobStreet,
Then I went dwn for the first interview w/o knowing what the Co is abt.
Because their website doesnt provide info to outsiders who aren't their clients, i supposed.
the first rnd of interview was rather short.
J didnt tell me wat the position requires me to do.
She said if im shortlisted for 2nd rnd interview then I will get to know.
She didnt even tell me wat the company specialises in or anthg.
I have to ask.
Then she told me financial services.
I was alil letdown aft that but thought that I wont stand a chance to be selected for the 2nd rnd. (Due to some probs i created for Stephanie, J's assistant, before the interview regarding the time of my interview)
Surprisingly, they called me in the aftnoon and told me to go dwn for the 2nd rnd interview.
So i did and the interview was damn draining!
It was almost 2hrs!!
Poor Bestie had to wait for me in town.
I was interviewed by J again and her manager, Eu, whom I will be working under and trained by.
Eu asked me sooooo many qns that I was brained dead aft that.
Immediately, she said that she was pleased with the way i answered her qns and the way i present myself and i was given the letter of offer by J.
However I knew that I didnt want and wont wna see myself in that job so I declined.
I took 20 mins to convince J that I shd be given time to consider and discuss with my parents first.
After that, she finally let me off by showing me her beautiful BLACK FACE!!
She didnt even said bye to me.
Merely said this " we don't anyhow recruit our mgt trainees. this time rnd only two vancacies so i hope u'd treasure this opportunity. E has high hopes on you."
I didnt like her attitude.
And everyone, I applied for events co-ordinator position and not mgt trainee!
Drama.

2007-10-09T20:00:00.000+08:00

Look at those eyes of his.. :)

2007-10-09T19:57:00.000+08:00

i like being with you.

2007-10-09T19:56:00.000+08:00

My retard!

2007-10-09T19:53:00.000+08:00

i miss hannie dearie:)

2007-10-09T19:51:00.000+08:00

i miss wenny!

2007-10-09T19:48:00.000+08:00

I wrapped that hamper!

2007-10-09T19:20:00.000+08:00

Good food to start with! :)

2007-10-09T19:18:00.000+08:00

only the two of us.

2007-10-09T19:14:00.000+08:00

They are my twin towers--ever so strong to stand by me for so long.

2007-10-09T19:13:00.000+08:00

**Blissful**

2007-10-09T19:11:00.000+08:00

She used to be that Auntie Ong. :))

I love being w u dearies.

2007-10-09T19:01:00.000+08:00

My bestie.

2007-10-07T18:35:00.000+08:00

Read Aveline's blog and thought abt wat she commented abt "the much-changed" me.
Years have passed and I have grown up thru those experiences.
Seriously three years in SIM changed me alot.

I went in with so much enthusiasm and drive.
Made countless new friends and life was beautiful and exciting in the first year.
I was surrounded by so much love and joy.
Sadly, campus life in year two did not follow suit.
In fact, it was a total opposite.
Qte a no. of my gd frens left aft a yr in SIM but not only that.
So much happened and so much heartaches.
Betrayal.
Misunderstandings.
Fights.
U name it,
I experienced it.
It was indeed a dramatic year.
I thought thgs like that only appear on national tv.
I have nv ever cried so much in any stages of my 22 yrs of life before.
Friendships,
Family,
Financial health of family,
Love.
They were all in undesirable states.
I was extremely disheartened.
Down and out.
I skipped so many classes that I did so badly in year two.
I broke down during exams and eventually didnt appear for the Marketing paper despite many persuading words from my other frens.
It was simply a horrible and bitter year.

The beginning of the "new" me was when I started my final year.
I wanted to start afresh.
Just concentrate on studying and nthg else.
Many sensed the change in me.
I didnt talk as much,
laughed as much,
joked as much,
smiled as much,
chill out as much,
and I didnt take the initiative to start a conversation or to meet up anymore.
I was emotionally and mentally fatigue.
I didnt wanna mix ard.
I wanna live in my own world.
Many started to worry.
Even at home,
my parents were worried.
I kept to myself all the time and locked myself up in the room all the time.
I have not said this to anyone before and nobody rli know wat rli happened and how bad it was.
But now I am ready.
Ready to tell and share and face everyone again.
Like before.
Life is short and I'd rather spend my remaining life being happy and share it w many of my loved ones ard me than to live alone in my own small and pathetic world.
This time I really hope I can finally succeed.
Its rli time to wake up from my "nv-will-come-true" dream.
He's with another girl alr.
Thats final.
That's reality.
Time to get my own life back.

I read my old blog entries and realized how much Ive toned down.
My life used to be so colourful and vibrant.
Now,
as my nick in msn shows,
"A blank piece of paper".

Thursday's meet up with bestie and eug made me realized how much we have truly grown.
How much we have matured.
The topics we had in our conversation will nv be the same anymore as compared to college days.
Its now to the working adults world.
Like it or not.
Bestie will never be the bubbly old Sharon, like the first day I knew her, anymore.
We are all facing increasing pressures and problems in our new phases of lives that make us lose our smiley faces.

The film Evan Almighty taught me a few thgs.
When we pray to god for sthg,
he doesnt give us that thg.
He gives us the OPPORTUNITY to achieve wat we prayed for.
Thus, i thank god for giving me the opportunity to make me grow up and being a stronger person.

2007-09-05T20:00:00.000+08:00

You and I were never meant to be together
And now it’s time for me to go
But deep in my heart
You will always stay forever.
In another place
In another time.
So walk with me and let me hold you close
And we will share this last memory
And dream about your love and what it means
To love someone enough to set me free.
In another place,
In another time.
In the space between any reason or rhyme
Someday we’ll have it all and our love will shine
In another place,
in another time.
You will always be the one of mine
In another place,
In another time.
In another place,
In another time.

2007-09-05T19:49:00.000+08:00

The results are out.
Truly am disappointed and angry with myself.
Friends were the ones encouraging and consoling me,
but not my closest ones.
not a word of comfort.
I know I have disappointed them big time.
Not only this time.
Its every time.

Uncontrollably, inferiority creeps in and confidence's wrecked.
I just feel like disappearing.
Feel like giving those "hypocrites" a big kick in their ass!!!

2007-09-05T19:43:00.000+08:00

My love.

2007-08-07T00:13:00.000+08:00

it has been a long time.
simply too lazy to blog.
for those who are truly concerned abt me,
this entry is for all of u.
im doing great.
still enjoyg life.
still in holiday mood.
everybody says enjoy while u can.
uve the nxt 30yrs to work.

so i shall continue to enjoy till i come back from yet another hk and sz trip. :)
Anw, the recent trip there w Jas, Jo and Nick was FUN!!!
It was rli shopg and eatg.
It was a helluva fun!
truly love the freedom and carefree tai-tai life.
every morn we wld be so excited of what lies ahead.
wat good bargains we'll get.
i truly truly enjoyed my 12 days there.
the company.
the shopping.
the food.
everything.
thks to all for sucha memorable trip.
love! :)

to u:
seriously i dntkw wats wrg btw us.
i know i was partly to blame.
but ive apologised and did wateva i can.
its now ur turn to show tt u care.
i care and u know i do.

on a happier note,
Man Utd won!! :)
Praying that the curse of winning the Shield wont come true this time rnd.
And Vidic is truly a HOTTIE!

To Hannie:
Dear!!!
im so glad ur back!
i missed you so much!!!!
love you.

2007-06-15T00:36:00.000+08:00

Yes our Hong Kong trip is finally CONFIRMED!!
I am really really excited man!! :))
Will not let anthg or anyone spoil my mood or my trip!
Here's a BIG BIG THANK YOU to Jas for putting in so much efforts into this trip.
I am alr grateful enough and im sure the trip will turn out GREAT!!! :)
Must take care of me horz!
Really appreciate watever u did to mk this possible.
Can't wait for 9th July! :)
Thank you once again.

I miss my lil clique so much! :((
Now my clique is all over the world!
Bestie is in Shanghai,
Hannie is in New York and
my Wenny is in Japan.
Met up with retard last Sat and felt rli weird w/o the rest ard.
Felt lonely tho ive retard's company.
I really miss my lil clique!!!!
Saw the clip my dearies made for me for my 21st party.
It made me tear again.
We have grown up with each other.
We have shared all kinda experiences tog thruout this 9yrs.
I miss those St Nicks days w them.
Those frequent hangouts at jubilee bubbletea hut, J8 and twn.
Those annual bday pranks.
Evthg.
Seriously, as i think back..I dnt think I can be wat i am w/o them by my side.
My Bestie.
My Hannie.
My Wenny.
My Retard.
I thnk you for evthg u guys did for me.
For all the love tt u guys hv showered me w.
For accepting me for who i am.
For that, im grateful.
i truly love all of u, yes each and every one of u, sooo much.
No one can ever replace the four of u in my heart.
No one.
I will pray tt all of u lead a blissful life tdy and everyday in the future.

thk u angels. :)

I feel damn stress now.
No not exams.
Exams are over.
I am suppose to be Lyns ans sherry's tour guide in Tokyo.
I am supposed to brush up on my limited Japanese vocabulary these few days but i feel damn lazy.
And the thg is ive forgotten almost evthg Miyuki san has taught us.
Im afraid that these two gers wont enjoy the trip cos they dnt like the places i will brg them to.
Im afraid of disappointing them cos they will be spendg alot on this trip.
URGH.....
I am afraid that i will be a poor poor tour guide and lose my way.
Cos the last time i went there was last year.
I am afraid i cant rmb how to go to this pl and tt pl.
But....for the sake of my two darls,

I will do my best to mk this the most enjoyable trip ever!!!! :))

Jas said: "are u sure that uve rli let it go?"
"every time we meet u say the same thg but its nv true..."
Seriously i hope i meant it.
But we just HAVE TO MEET THEM once ive said tt.
We just have to be at the same shop at the same time.
And its not only him.
There was her beside him.
He is no longer alone.
He has found her...
I wndered y is god playing such tricks on me..
till today, deep dwn i knw ive nv succeed in letg evthg go.
its damn hard.
i dnt knw why.
ive tried.
but again, i failed.
like wat jas hv said.

2007-06-13T17:36:00.000+08:00

its so good to see him in that shirt again!

2007-06-13T17:30:00.000+08:00

2007-06-13T17:28:00.000+08:00

i love this look// :)

2007-06-13T17:23:00.000+08:00

**Indeed, he's England's Finest 7**

2007-06-13T14:52:00.001+08:00

Yes exams are finally over.
Yes I have been having nthg else but FUN, FUN and FUN!
Been spending so much tt im almost bankrupt! :(
But who cares!
Met up with so many ppl for the past week that suddenly i feel tired.
And it made me really sit dwn and think what lies ahead.
Haven't been searching for jobs yet.
Just feel like having fun to compensate for the 2mths of mental and emotional torture I have went thru.
This year's exams have been hell man!
Icp and Auditing have been a nightmare.
'Nuff said.
Its over.

Now for my new phase in life.
Adult life.
Seriously i fear wat lies ahead.
I dnt rli know wat i wna be as in wat my career will be.
Everyone has been asking wat type of job im looking for.
Have i start looking fer jobs alr not?
Sighh I will miss my student life.
I envy my year one frns.
they dnt have to worry abt the probs im facing right now.
But everyone has to grow up uh.
I know that.

Well lets talk abt happier stuffs.
Next weds Lyns, sherry and me will be heading to Japan for 8 days.
Cant wait!!! :))
We will have fun, fun and fun!!
After that it will be to hong kong with jas and her bf in July.
Then if i cant find a job til August then I shall follow my sis to Canada!!! :))
What an exciting life!!!! :))

I dreamt abt my frn last nite.
Have been contacting her since last week.
Smses and calls but no response till now.
At first i was a lil pissed but subsequently, i got worried.
Now im v worried.
Dear girl, I think u will knw tt im talking abt u.
No matter what, please gimme a msg or sthg.
I dnt know wat ur gg thru but one thg fer sure is that im alws here fer u.
If u ever nd a listening ear, i will be der.
really really hope ur fine.
I want to hear from u soon.
Lets go out soon!!!!

Finally, lets talk abt Becks!
He's sucha incredible guy.
When everyone was putting him dwn,
he says nthg but merely just work and work and climb his way up by his own hardwork n sweat.
Five mths ago,
he was seen as a loser by almost everybody.
Five mths later,
everyone wans a piece of him.
Everyone just cant stop taking abt him.
Nobody can write a script like that.
This guy here is really an outta-this-world kinda story.
Thats wat mk everyone love him!
even those who hate him,
hate him cos they love him!
haha i dnt mk sense!
but seriously,
no one can beat him.
He's my super-duper darling idol!!!!!! :)))
*muacks*

2007-06-13T13:57:00.000+08:00

My dear Mandy!

2007-06-13T13:45:00.000+08:00

The +Twinnie+, the +Dumpling+, the +Weirdo+

**lovelovelove**

2007-06-13T13:43:00.000+08:00

**My Twinnie!**

2007-06-06T12:11:00.000+08:00

i love her to bits!

2007-06-06T12:07:00.000+08:00

Flowers frm Sherry! Red-im a man utd fan; Blue-cos I'm from St.Nicks; White-cos Im the youngest and purest!! :) 2nd version: Red-cos im a man utd fan; blue represents sherry herself and white rep lyns cos sherry thinks that lyn is v holy!!! :))) LOVE IT!

2007-06-06T12:05:00.000+08:00

Mister Blue Beary Pancake!--by Sherry dear!

2007-06-06T12:04:00.000+08:00

**i love her too!**

2007-06-06T12:01:00.000+08:00

*My CJ buds*

2007-06-06T11:57:00.000+08:00

Thanks for being my pillars of strength. i love u darls!

2007-05-15T03:25:00.000+08:00

Premiership Champions 2006/07 *MANCHESTER UNTIED*

2007-05-15T03:20:00.000+08:00

The two captains tog with a team of fighters.

2007-05-15T03:19:00.000+08:00

Let me kiss the trophy first!!....

2007-05-15T03:18:00.000+08:00

no no......we kiss it together!!....

2007-05-15T03:14:00.000+08:00

My sweetest buds came to deliver this specially made-for-bossie-cake on 7th May 2007 12.38am!

2007-05-15T03:12:00.000+08:00

Hannie's grandma is sucha darl!!! :))

2007-05-15T03:11:00.000+08:00

It appeared that my family knew about the "plan" too! :)

2007-05-15T03:09:00.000+08:00

The cake tasted sweeter because of the love i felt from u darls! :)

2007-05-15T03:07:00.000+08:00

SURPRISE!

2007-05-15T03:02:00.000+08:00

Can't thank god enough for such blessings.

2007-05-15T02:59:00.000+08:00

They gave me a magical magical night. 14th May 2007--a night spent w 3 angels. (1 more in Shanghai)

2007-05-15T02:57:00.000+08:00

My first hand-made card in eons........

2007-05-15T02:54:00.000+08:00

The menu for tonight!

2007-05-15T02:52:00.000+08:00

The beautiful sunset.

2007-05-15T02:46:00.000+08:00

Our main course finally!

2007-05-15T02:45:00.000+08:00

Our second main course.

2007-05-15T02:44:00.000+08:00

Night view.

2007-05-15T02:41:00.000+08:00

She finally met us at 8.07pm.

2007-05-15T02:40:00.000+08:00

On the way to our last round.

2007-05-15T02:39:00.000+08:00

I am blessed.

2007-05-15T02:37:00.000+08:00

My love.

2007-05-15T02:35:00.000+08:00

thanks for evthg hannie darling!

2007-05-15T02:32:00.000+08:00

We hate to say goodbye to sucha sweet ride tog.

2007-05-15T02:31:00.000+08:00

They planned this magical night for me.

2007-05-15T02:29:00.000+08:00

My second bday cake from my clique. Its Yummy-licious!!

2007-05-15T02:27:00.000+08:00

"hey! the cake is meant for ME!!!! not YOU!"

2007-05-15T02:26:00.000+08:00

Oh my retard!

2007-05-15T02:21:00.000+08:00

Love of my life. *The end of a magical night*

2007-05-15T02:16:00.000+08:00

the three of us*

2007-05-15T02:15:00.000+08:00

i love her muchie!

2007-05-15T01:29:00.000+08:00

i love her much too!!

2007-05-15T01:26:00.000+08:00

She's my baby!

2007-05-13T17:13:00.000+08:00

Happy Birthday to Fen, Hui and Justin!!!
May ur lives be smoothsailing and filled w laughter and love everyday from now on!
It has been a blessing to know all of u!
You guys hv all coloured my boring life!
thank you!!! :)

Here's a big shout-out to Hannie, Wenny and hannie's grandma!
Thanks for coming all the way to surprise me with ur homemade cake!!
It was rli sweeeeeettttttttttt!!
im truly touched tho i may not show it.
haha its all in the heart yea?
Seriously, u girls are my bestest buds ever!
and i can NEVER ask for more.
Im soooooo looking forward to tmr.. :)
u girls rock my world!!

Thanks Bestie-Yings who gave me a call right aft u reached home aft ur trip to Mongolia.
Much appreciated and im missing u to bits i tell ya!!!
can't wait to fly to shanghai to find u in june!!!
wait for meeeeeeeeeeee..........
iloveu dear.

Big thks to my bimbos, nick, wy, jiejun and gang for evthg u did fer me last mon.
You guys made me feel rli rli truly blessed man!
muacks to all!

thk you eug for tt prez.
thks for all the wishes and blessings from everyone.
thks fer remembering.
i truly love all of ya.

Met my bestie *sha* on fri aft icp paper.
I rli missed her so much.
It was the first time since a long long time ago tt we actually have the time and opportunity to sit dwn and talk abt everything under the sun.
The first time in eons tt we actually have heart-to-heart conversations.
Those that we used to share w each other in jc times.
Nobody else, just the two of us.
I guess we can nv find tt kinda "true smiles" anymore on our faces.
People grow and lives can nv be tt simple ever agn.
But darl, wats most impt is tt we can find tt "smile" whn we hv each others' company.
That makes the bond we share more special isnt it?
Thanks for ur love and ever opened arms.
iloveu bestie.
but.....send me my present!!!! haha

Had Marketing and Icp papers last week.
Marketing was fine.
But Icp was horrendous!!!!
Think I'll flunk man.
It was thorough crapping all the way for 3 hours!
After the paper, I was telling Fen and YY how proud i was abt myself.
The amount I can crap out was truly amazing considering i only studied 4 units (which Nageb said WILL be HUNDRED PERCENT BE OUT),
2 of them did not.
And we have to complate four qns!
I almost wanted to give up.
But since i was alr there,
jst crap as much as i can using all the knowledge nageb taught thruout this whole year, tog w some of my common-sense, i managed to crap out four qns using 2 booklets.
hah..the markers will hv fun marking my paper as theres nthg to mark but loadsa nonsense to entertain them.
Yea..thats how bad my Icp paper went. :(

Lastly, to all my peeps who are mugging for exams, stay strong!!
It will be over soooooonnnnnnnn!!!
*hugs*

2007-04-15T20:03:00.000+08:00

Now that it's all said and done
I can't believe you were the one
to build me up and tear me down,
like an old abandoned house.

And what you said when you left,
just left me cold and out of breathe.
I fell too far, was way too deep.
Guess I let you get the best of me.

Well I never saw it coming
I should have started running
a long time ago.
And I never thought to doubt you.

I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure
I guess its really over
I am finally getting better.

Now I'm picking up the pieces
and spending all of these years
putting my heart back together
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

You took a hammer to these walls,
dragged the memories down the hall,
packed your bags and walked away,
there was nothing I could say.

And when you slammed the front door shut,
alot of others opened up.
So did my eyes, so I could see
that you were never the best for me.

Well I never saw it coming,
I should have started running
a long time ago.

And I never thought to doubt you
I'm better off without you
more than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure
I guess it's really over
I'm finally getting better.

Now I'm picking up the pieces
and spending all these years,
putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

2007-04-15T19:54:00.000+08:00

I have mixed feelings whn i see u guys tog.
Part of me was happy tt uve gotten urself sucha nice girl.
Yet, another part of me was confused n alil dwn.
I think this time round,
I've finally woken up.
You don't know and won't bother what i'm gg thru these two yrs.
Its rli not worth feeling emotional over u.
I guess I rli have to get over u now.
I hv to leave all these nonsenses behind and lead a new life.
Somehow, when it all finally settled in tt dae,
I feel as tho I was stabbed in the heart.
But, now I finally understand (hopefully)
tt no matter how upset and hurt by ur actions,
u'll nv give a damn.
u will nv bother.
I shd hv listened to wat others told me long ago
I shd hv given up
I shd not have fallen so deep.
No matter what,
now I know tt its really time,
to get over u.

Both of u hv my blessings.
And to you,
I wish u well from the bottom of my heart.
Serious.

2007-04-08T19:11:00.000+08:00

Just when I thot I was getting better emotionally,
you have to do this.
You have to give me the call that I wish I didnt answer last nite.
I have only started to see some light aft living in the dark for the last three weeks.
Now uve brought me all the way back to darkness again.
Didnt have the mood to talk tdy.
I feel so tired.
I rli hate my life!
I rli hate MYSELF!!

2007-04-06T22:50:00.000+08:00

Had a brilliant night with my dearest hannie and wenny last night.
Had dinner at JP cos Hannie's staying in hall to study fer her upcoming exams.
And wenny drove last nite as well!
Had so much fun in her car! :)
It was the first time since long long time ago tt we had heart-to-heart talk with each other.
only the two of us.
and rli i hope i can be like her.
i wld love to hv her outlook of life and her "tk thgs lightly" attitude.
Seriously, if im like her, it will save me frm so much sadness n pain.
Anw, we talked alot last nite.
Alot abt our st nicks life and how i want to be everyones' first child's godma.
and who will be the first amongst us five to get married.
We both chose Hannie.
Maybe cos she gives both of us this mummy's kinda feeling whn she's with us.
As we talked, we suddenly realised tt nxt yr it will be the 10th year since we gotta know each other.
how time flies.
10 years passes by like a breeze.
We have went thru 3 phases of life tog alr.
First, secondary school days.
Next, our first phase in a mixed school since 11yrs in an all girls' sch--Junior College.
Third, uni life.
Now, we are accompanying each other into our nxt phase which is working life.
And we'll many many other phases to come!! :))
Being someone's wife, mummy and grandmummy!!
How exciting!
Nthg beats seeing each other grow up and face challenges in different phases of our lives tog. Nthg beats hanging out with these angels all these years.
I alws feel so comfortable, warm n embraced with their company.

I remembered zhenhao said this one day "its alws ur secondary sch days friends who are ur tru frns.."
now i finally understand.
the love btw us is so pure and true.
simplicity and no false fronts.
we truly appreciate each other and care for each other frm the bottom of our hearts.
Even non-frequent meet-ups won't hurt wat we hv amongst us.

To my lil clique,
thank you for ur support and love all these years.
We have walked dwn a long way tog alr,
but there are still more long years still to come!
And i cant wait to share wat lies ahead w u guys.
Remember that u darls are the gems in my life and i will never ever exchange anthg for our precious frnships.
Thanks for the ever strong shoulders for me to lean on.
thks fer all the priceless memories u girls gave me.
All of u hold special places in my heart which nobody else will ever and can ever replace.
i truly love all of u darls and im truly blessed.

*Hannie, Lyns, Sherry, Fen and Wenny*
Thanks for ur constant comforting words thruout these painful 3 weeks.
Thks for ur patience and ur listening ears.
Without all of ur support,
I wldnt have the courage to move on.
I wldnt have the determination to let go of those unworthy fellow.
I wldnt smile agn.
Thank you to all u lovelies,
from the bottom of my heart.
I will stay strong and live even better than before.
Im sure i can do away with idiots in my life.
I will alws rem wat lyns said
"its their loss.."

Today, she asked me a qns tt i didnt know how to ans.
i cannot say "yes" straight to her.
i didnt wna hurt wat we hv right now.
actually i wna tell her tt i didnt like the way she treats me.
i didnt like the fact tt she's alws insulting or sayg thgs to me in a sarcastic manner.
i wna tell her tt i feel tt we r driftg and i rli dnt knw wat to say whn we meet up.
but i didnt.
i was too tired and didnt wna talk much.
i dnt wna feel upset all over agn.
i feel that theres no point sayg cos she'll nv change.
so just leave thgs as it is.
im contented this way.
all that i need to know is that she is living blissfully right now.
tts more than enuf.
i wish her well.

back to sch later.
a hectic week.
ive sch frm tdy all the way to nxt sunday.
everyday frm 10am-5pm and tues frm 9am-9pm.
i wndr how i can survive this.
urghhhhh
*whines*

**i miss my yings bestie so much!**
cant wait to see u in june! -hugs-

2007-04-02T19:27:00.000+08:00

Seriously, I think I hv thought it through
and ive decided to let evthg go.
At the end of the day,
only true worthy ones will prevail.
I will know who are the ones cos they will be the ones who truly will stand by u thru every storm.
Thanks to Lyns, Sherry, Hannie and dear ah Fen
for standing w me thruout these tough 3 weeks or so.
Thanks for ur patience w me and i truly love you all.
U lovies hv been such blessings in my life.
I am contented.
Shan't let those unworthy n self-centered ppl upset me anymore.
I hv given enuf and its time to tk a step back.
Its time to rest.
So to those unworthy ones,
u know u are one of those on my list,
whn u realize ive stopped sms-ing, msn-sing and arranging meet-ups with u.
And whn i dont reply ur msn msgs and sms-es.
Stop wasting my time.
Ive done so much and if u guys do not appreciate,
then I will nv be able to satisfy u and mk u happy.
I will alws be an idiot to you and i will alws be someone who alws ask u questions tt u'll nv know how to answer.
So even if u dnt feel the loss,
theres nthg much i can say n do.
So be it then.
Period.

I have let it go.
Feeling peaceful and free! :)

Class at Mgt House today was pretty gd.
Tho we hv to walk qte a distance to the sch.
Haider Ali is so much better than last yr!
I totally find marketing interesting aft wat he taught today.
And he can actually tell jokes!
Totally enjoyed the lecture.
And the company of dumpling, Alex, Connie, Szeyee and Victor.
I guess I have to start enjoying life again.

2007-03-21T13:53:00.000+08:00

The ever loving couple of 36 years.

2007-03-21T13:50:00.000+08:00

How i wish she's the one staying in Spore and not the other.

2007-03-21T13:47:00.000+08:00

We are happier w/o her.

2007-03-21T13:45:00.000+08:00

Awfully Chocolate Cake.

2007-03-21T13:41:00.000+08:00

Daddy's actual bday. I truly love them.

2007-03-21T13:33:00.000+08:00

9 pairs heels within 45 mins. Tts what women do whn they are feeling depressed and vexed.

2007-03-20T03:23:00.000+08:00

Happy 60th birthday Daddy dearest!! thks for all the love n sacrifices uve made for us thruout all these years. u deserve all the blessings u received on this special nite.

2007-03-20T03:18:00.000+08:00

The cake that everyone liked and which was paid for by me.

2007-03-20T03:16:00.000+08:00

We gave him this big celebration.

2007-03-20T03:13:00.000+08:00

**Sisters are nv complete w/o the three of us!**

2007-03-20T03:09:00.000+08:00

Mommy and her sisters! -from youngest to oldest-

2007-03-20T03:07:00.000+08:00

**Mommy and her brothers**

2007-03-20T03:05:00.000+08:00

**My pretty cousin! <3

2007-03-20T03:03:00.000+08:00

Doesn't Kevin (the one w glasses) reminds u of "da fan shu" frm the comic "lao fu zi"?? He's so adorable!!

2007-03-20T03:00:00.000+08:00

I just love "da fan shu" too much!

2007-03-20T02:57:00.000+08:00

*zenden baby!*

2007-03-20T02:55:00.000+08:00

Little rascals!

+memories+of+bossie+

*it has been more than a year!*

I love being w u dearies.

it has been more than a year!